31 Days: Starting to Finish

Every October, writers join together in a challenge “31 days of…” The idea is that every day, for 31 days, we will write on a specified topic. Each writer chooses something different, but stays true to that topic throughout the month. Today is the fourth day of the month as I write this (but not as I publish) and I haven’t even chosen a topic.

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Books, Books, Books: A Three Things Thursday post

After focusing on what I haven’t been doing in Tuesday’s blog post, I thought I would switch it up and share something I’ve been stellar at these past few months. READING. Every year on Goodreads I set a yearly goal for myself.

In my first year of tracking (2012) I surpassed my book-a-week goal, reading 64 over 52 weeks. The next year I upped my goal to 75, and fell just 2 short. Last year started off slow, but then I picked it up and finished with a respectable 59.

This year, I set my goal at 60. By April I was over half way there (counting audiobooks). At this point, I’ve consumed 101 books, with 58 of those being actually read by me (either a print or ebook). Barring anything horribly tragic in the next couple of days, I think I’ve got this in the bag.

Currently Reading

1. I’ve been on a roll lately listening to autobiographies (in audiobook form, of course) of comedians as well as humor essay compilations. I mostly listen during my commute, or while doing mindless data entry at work. These lighthearted tales keep my mood upbeat despite the mundane.
   
   Photo credit: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/25154938-neil-patrick-harris
   
   

   Neil Patrick Harris: Choose Your Own Autobiography by Neil Patrick Harris, read by Neil Patrick Harris is no exception. He had to alter the Choose-Your-Own format for the audio structure, but his team did a good job with their workarounds. Of course having him perform the books, rather than just a straight read makes it enjoyable as well.
   

2. My current fiction read (Kindle loan from my library) is Sea of Monsters – Percy Jackson & The Olympians, Book 2 by Rick Riordan. I’m only a couple of chapters in, so I can’t really speak to this particular story, but I loved the first book.
   
3. On a more serious front, I’m also reading Simply Jesus: A New Vision of Who He Was, What He Did, and Why He Matters by N.T. Wright. I try to always have a non-fiction Christian book in the stack. This is a bit weightier than I am accustom to, but I enjoy his writing style. Having never read Wright, I trust his words based off associations with others I’ve read including Scot McKnight and Timothy Keller.

What are you reading these days? Have you finished any must-reads which I need to add to my list?

God’s Gift

Words are my thing.  I love them so much, I truly believe they are God’s gift to me. When I don’t have time to read them, I try to make a way to at least listen to them. Right now I’m listening to the memoir of an author I’ve loved since I was a teenager. The following is a quote from one of HIS mentors:

All that is not the love of God has no meaning for me. I can truthfully say that I have no interest in anything but the love of God which is in Christ Jesus. If God wants it to, my life will be useful through my words and witness. If he wants it to, it will bear fruit through my prayers and sacrifices. But the usefulness of my life is his concern, not mine. It would be indecent for me to worry about that.

 -The final journal entry of Brother Domonique of The Little Brothers of Jesus
as quoted in All is Grace by Brennan Manning

{Emphasis added by me.} Sometimes I get so caught up in making a difference for God, I lose site of Him. Under a holy banner, the god of self creeps in. I want fruit – not to show how incredible my Lord is, but to serve as proof of my worth.

Little by little the Father is showing me my gift, while also keeping me humble. This past Sunday, I co-taught Bible study with a classmate because our regular teacher was out sick. I felt like I had so much information in my head to share, but I got tripped up on my most favoritest of things – words.
Thankfully, my sister-in-Christ was able to step in and speak eloquently about the topic at hand.

Confession: I’ve stopped the timer twice already to give myself a break from this post. Despite the quote above, I can’t stop wishing for my words to be powerful. Wanting something more from them, beyond just the freedom to put words to the page.

Okay I’ll just come out with it. I’ve been asked to start an off-shoot Bible Study class by my current teacher. Our class is about to outgrow the size of our room.

Part of me is excited. I love reading the word and dissecting it with others. But the other part of me is sad. I’ve really come to love our the community my current class has cultivated. As a unite, we are living the Christian life as it ought to be lived. Those are big shoes to fill, in taking a leadership position of my own.

In addition to that, I’m afraid of the vacuum in my life that it will create. A new class will take time to get established, the relationships will take work. This whole process will take work, and reliance on God every step of the way. Those are 2 things that, quite frankly, I suck at.

 
Linking up with Jaime today, despite having gone over the 5 minute rule several times over.

Rethinking: Reading + Running

Sometimes the doing of a particular project begins to overshadow the heart and motivation behind it. I’ve been bogged down with 2 specific goals for myself this year – read 75 books for the year and set new personal records at each race distance available to me.

Last year, I read 72 books, making me feel as if 75 wasn’t so crazy of a goal. I got behind early this year as I slogged through The Book Thief. I suppose the title is fitting, given it stole my desire to read for a few weeks following.

At this point in the year with only 26 books logged so far, I’d have to switch to short/quick reads if I have any hope of reading goal. When my aunt offered to loan me a 600 page hardback, I started to say “thanks but no thanks.”

I have a big race coming up this weekend – the only 8K I have on my radar this year. If I’m going to PR at every distance this year, Saturday night’s race is huge. The fear started a few weeks ago. The what-ifs nagging at my brain.

When I confessed my concern to a Facebook run group I’m a member of, one of the ladies responded:

You’re going to do great! Even if you don’t PR, you may have failed to reach that goal, but that does NOT make you a failure. You’ll likely have worked hard and made big gains in your fitness, while enjoying the sport you love. I’m excited for you!

So now its time for an even bigger confession. I’ve not been enjoying my runs these day. Whether it be checking on the dew point to see if an attempt outside at lunch can be made, or slogging through yet another workout on the treadmill, running has become a chore.

Same with reading – when the objective becomes getting through this book in order to tackle the next, all the enjoyment of savoring the story and characters has been removed.  Compromising the type of book I enjoy merely to get my numbers up is a colossal waste of time and effort.

My goal for the remainder of the year becomes to refocus. To find my joy again. Because, after all, these things I do are merely hobbies. Sure they stretch my mind and my lungs, but at the end of the day I do them for the fun of it.

If I fail at these goals I’ve set, there is no punishment, save the frustration I inflict upon myself. I will not be forced to surrender my book collection to the local library. I won’t be forced to take down all my race medals.

After my race this weekend, I think I’m going to take the month of August off from formal training. I trained for the Knoxville Marathon through April, then sprung straight into Expo 10K training. I gave myself a week off due to illness after that, then dove head first into this 8K training cycle. My body and mind are long overdue for a little R&R.

This doesn’t, however, mean I won’t run at all. Rather, I’ll be running without the constraints of a training schedule with specific paces. If I get bored of easy runs, I’ll throw in some strides or sprints. The point is not to slack, but rather release myself from the stress.

As for reading, I’ve officially given up hope on my goal. I originally set reading goals for myself so I wouldn’t be tempted to be lazy watch TV instead. Now that I’ve got a hammock on my front porch, I have no trouble taking a hour or three to kick back and enjoy a good book.

What are some of your personal goals? Do you have plans in place to help you reach them? Have you ever gotten so focused on a goal you missed the whole point?

Stop.

 When I first considered adding Deeping the Soul for Justice by Bethany Hoang to my reading list (and Marla’s read along to my bloggy list), I didn’t think I had the emotional energy. 

Turns out, Hoang agrees with me.  The first chapter is all about seeking God.  The second chapter?  Carving out time for a Sabbath.  These are both things I desperately need, and chronically neglect.

Life is busy, and going to church alone is hard.  I’ve found myself entering a church building only a handful of times since we moved to the new place.  I’ll watch church on TV from the comfort of my couch, coffee in hand.  I sometimes stream church on my laptop, on my front porch overlooking the stream in my front yard. 

The result is the same, I spend an hour or so singing God’s praises, and receive a message from the Lord (via His preacher) on a topic that always seems to nail me right in the heart.

Only its not the same.  Sometimes I find myself, phone-in-hand playing a quick word (with a friend of course).  I occasionally press pause to get more coffee or ask Jay a question about how the rest of our day is going to play out.

I need more than a Sabbath day, I need the spirit of the Sabbath. 

Designated phone-free time each day.  A church home. 

Why do such simple things sound so unattainable?

Seeking First Things First

I struggle with prayer.  As a Christian, I should pray.  I should want to pray, to open the communication channel with my Creator, to bring the petitions of others before Him.  My struggle isn’t with the intellection portion of prayer at all, but rather putting it into practice.

Sure I’ll offer up a prayer when someone puts a request on twitter.  I occasionally even use a prayer request app on my phone to keep track.  I’m even reading a book about putting away books and just sitting alone with God.  How’s that for irony?

I’ve tried praying in bed (I fall asleep).  I’ve tried praying while running (I see a squirrel and get distracted).   I’ve tried praying while driving down the road (then I get stuck behind a slow moving tourist and lose my religion).

Seeking God is a latch-ditch effort. 

I’ve grown weary.

He has told you what is good
and what it is the Lord requires of you:
to act justly,
to love faithfulness,
and to walk humbly with your God.

Micah 6:8 HCSB

My friend Marla started another read along a couple of weeks ago, discussing the book(let) Deeping the Soul for Justice by Bethany Hoang.  I’m weary in life, and didn’t really want to take on one more thing on my plate.  The book promised to be a quick read, weighing in at just 48 pages.  The subject matter, however, is a weighty one.  The whole point of the book (as I understand) is to open our eyes to injustice surrounding us and to take action.

I joke that Marla prayer-pressured me to join up.  I enjoy reading, blogging, and making new friends.  Only God knew how badly I needed this.  The first chapter doesn’t deal with justice at all, but rather starts at the beginning.  Funny how I easily skip this step.

We cannot begin to change the world in Jesus’ name without consulting Him first.  We need His strength.  His direction.  Anything less with result in a worn and weary spirit. 

So today, I will follow the advice in the book on solitude.  I will follow the advice of the book about justice.  I will start this day – the day that will end with me attending my 2^nd funeral in a matter of 6 days –  seeking God.

*deep breath in*

Lord Jesus Christ

*deep breath out*

Have mercy on me

Finally!

 

 

I have no words.  Besides:

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeTHUD

 

and

 

#TEAMRANGER

 

What are you reading this month?

Who Doesn’t Have Fun with Books?

I missed last week’s What I’m Reading Wednesday (hosted by Lindsay).  As an update, I’ve finished off all 4 of my books in the “currently reading” and then some.  Bringing me to 12 complete out of my goal of 75 for the year. 

cover	title	author	isbn	isbn13	asin	num pages	avg rating	num ratings	date pub	date pub (ed.)			review	notes	recommender	comments	votes	read count	date started		date added	date purchased	owned	purchase location	condition	format
checkbox	position	cover	title Lord, I Need Grace to Make It	author Arthur, Kay	isbn 1888655526	isbn13 9781888655520	asin	num pages 247 pp	avg rating 4.50	num ratings 2	date pub Jan 01, 1990	date pub edition Dec 28, 1996			review None[edit]	notes None[edit]	recommender none	comments 0	votes 0	# times read 0	date started Jan 27, 2013 [edit]		date added Jan 27, 2013	date purchased (add)	owned	purchase location (add)	condition (add)	format Paperback [edit]
checkbox	position	cover	title Letters To A Young Evangelical	author Campolo, Tony	isbn 0465008313	isbn13 9780465008315	asin	num pages 288 pp	avg rating 3.75	num ratings 103	date pub 2006	date pub edition Nov 28, 2006			review None[edit]	notes None[edit]	recommender none	comments 0	votes 0	# times read 0	date started Jan 26, 2013 [edit]		date added Jan 26, 2013	date purchased (add)	owned	purchase location (add)	condition (add)	format Hardcover [edit]
checkbox	position	cover	title Good Christian Bitches	author Gatlin, Kim	isbn 1401310702	isbn13 9781401310707	asin	num pages 291 pp	avg rating 2.84	num ratings 1,025	date pub Oct 31, 2008	date pub edition Jan 17, 2012			review None[edit]	notes None[edit]	recommender none	comments 0	votes 0	# times read 0	date started Jan 26, 2013 [edit]		date added Jan 17, 2013	date purchased (add)	owned	purchase location (add)	condition (add)	format Paperback [edit]

All books about Christianity…kinda.  Kay Arthur’s book is my morning devotional.  Tony Campolo is a revolutionary Christian author I’ve read since I was a teenager – he really challenges (in a good way) what I believe and why.  And of course GCB is my guilty pleasure “fluff” reading.  I’m not very far through any of the above, so its too soon to tell if I’d recommend any of them.

If you are on Good Reads friend me! If you don’t know what it is – check out www.goodreads.com.

Thursday’s 10: The Book Edition

Inspired by Lora’s Thursday 10 list, I wanted to share with you what’s currently on my bookshelves.  Figuratively, of course, because literally we’d go well over 10.

This picture was taken by Jay after he moved his books in (the right side).  The left side is entirely mine and now also full.  These shelves will be one of the things I miss the most when we move.

 

 

I’m Currently Reading:

 

1) Crater by Homer Hickam

 

This is one I’m reviewing for Book Sneeze.  Its a fun, easy fiction read.  However, I’m in the middle of several other books (see below) so I’m slow getting through it.  Reading a chapter of each at a sitting makes for slow progress.

 

2) Just Enough Light for the Step I’m On by Stormie Omartian

 

I wasn’t a fan of the Power of a Praying Wife, and didn’t like this one at first either.  It came in one of the boxes of “Christian Living” books Jay bought for me a couple of Christmases ago.  I will say, that these past few chapters of Light have been applicable and helpful, thus changing my over all opinion of the book.

 

3) Beyond the Picket Fence… by Lori Wick

 

This book is a collection of short stories – light hearted and very easy to read.  I wouldn’t enjoy this type of writing as a full novel, but I like keeping the book in my car to pass time when I’m waiting.  (At a doctor’s office, meeting a friend to go for a run, sitting at a red light/in traffic)

 

4) Answering the Big Questions About God by Jim Thomas

 

I’m taking this book a chapter at a time to afford myself time to really ponder the author’s position.  While I like his reasoning style, I’m not sure how effective it would be as an apologetics book written to the non-Christian audience.

 

5) The Jesus Revolution by Leith Anderson

 

I’m  only a chapter into this book, so I can’t say much about it, only I was glad to download it as I am going through the book of Acts for my Bible-in-a-Year plan.  I’ll be done with books 2 & 4 in the next day or so, and hope to get to a point in this book where my Bible reading and the book chapter line up.  Thankfully my chronological plan has me in Romans/Corinthians for the next week or so, while I catch up in the book.

 

 

On my To-Read shelf

 

6) A Year of Biblical Womanhood by Rachel Held Evans

 

I received my copy in the mail this week and am excited to get started.  My goal is to always have 3 books going: fiction, non-fiction, & car-reading, so I’m going to have to hold off for a bit on this.

 

7) Notorious Nineteen by Janet Evanovich

 

My mother and I love the Stephanie Plum series, so I pre-ordered this book for her for her birthday.  No doubt she’ll pass it on to me when she’s done with it (if not before).

 

8)  Pirate Latitudes by Michael Crichton

 

Crichton was my favorite author and this is the last of his books (published posthumously).  I hate to read it really, because I’ll never have another new book of his to be excited about reading.

 

9) Enough: Find More By Living With Less by Will Davis Jr

 

Recommended by Marla, this title is pretty self explanatory.  I haven’t, however, figured out a way to buy a new book that teaches me how to not buy new things.  Library perhaps?

 

10) The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin

 

This book came on my radar because several of my Good Reads friends have read and liked it.

 

 

What are you reading these days?  Should I add it to my list? 





The God of Fashionable Curtains

Its true what they say, girls become their mothers with age.  I’m slowly maturing into my Mama’s clone.  And I’m totally okay with it.

A few years ago, I felt differently.  One afternoon she called me, proclaiming the goodness of our Lord in a mistake that was made in her JC Penny order.  Instead of shipping her curtain X (her choice), curtain Y arrived in the mail.  She called the company, notifying them of their error.  They let her know that she could either keep Y (for the price of X) or ship it back and they would replace it.

My mother hung the curtains and decided she liked these curtains better than the ones she had ordered.  “God took care of me,” she claimed. 

“Seriously Mother?  What makes you think that God gives a rip about what kind of curtains you have hanging in your house?”

I don’t think I realized how much hurt my words carried.  No one in my family is secretive about our struggle with confidence, self worth, and anxiety.  Yet my mother had finally gotten to a point in her life where she believe God loved her so much, that He sent a keying error to a customer service rep in order to bring a smile to her face.

As Christians, we believe Jesus left his home in heaven – forsaking the beauty of God for us, to bleed, suffer, and die because we have a problem with sin.  How then, is it such a stretch for him to do small, seemingly trivial things for us?  Especially if it brings him praise?

Every good and perfect gift is from above, <sup class="crossreference" value="(A)”> coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, <sup class="crossreference" value="(B)”> who does not change <sup class="crossreference" value="(C)”> like shifting shadows.  James 1:17

Now I’m not going to argue in favor of JC Penny having “perfect” curtains, but I do believe God wants our praise.  I also think he proves himself faithful in the little things sometimes to give us the courage to trust him in the big things.

When I worried that I would run alone during the Knoxville Marathon training runs, Lisa prayed God would send her someone who ran the same pace as her.  He answered her prayer, by sending her me.  Even in my sinful state (let’s just be honest that worry is not only a sin, but denial of God’s power and authority), God used me to answer prayer.

Having not learned my lesson, I recently began worrying about finding a safe place to ride my bike while preparing for my upcoming triathlon.  Never did it cross my mind to pray about it, after all – God doesn’t care about silly things like my training schedule, or so I thought.   Until I woke up Saturday morning with the perfect place in mind. 

This perfect spot isn’t anywhere I dreamed up.  As a matter of fact, it hadn’t even crossed my mind.  Until it hit me that morning.  I could say it was “out of no where” but I don’t think that’s an accurate statement.  The perfect subdivision came like a slap across the face from heaven “trust me, I’ve got this,” the slap said.

Casting all your care on him; for he cares for you.  1 Peter 5:7

I’m currently dealing with much bigger things in my life than simply training concerns (and promise to blog about them shortly), and I desperately needed this reminder, this assurance He’s up there watching out for me.

I don’t claim to know why some go to bed hungry each night, yet my mother gets sent curtains from God.  I don’t know why I get the medicine I need to heal me, while others die of their disease.  I do, however, celebrate the God of the Universe who sent his son to rescue the perishing.  I celebrate the God has promised to meet all of our needs.  I celebrate the God of fashionable curtains, because he seeks after his lambs so that he may bring them back to him.

I’d love for you to share one way God has tangibly shown his love for you.